I’m here to talk to you today about a very important matter.  The mute button.

Why is this so important?  Take for instance a recent conference call with my husband’s extended family to plan an upcoming trip.  I used the mute button during most of the call, so I could go on with my life, listening to all the plans and unmutting every once in a while to interject.  As we were nearing the end of the phonecall I unmuted to say something, but no one seemed to hear me.  I looked and couldn’t tell by looking if the phone was on mute or not.  I pushed the mute button and “unmute” flashed on the screen.  At that moment the past half hour flashed through my head.  Was it muted or not when…  Let’s just say that my husbands extended family may have heard Nerds being crunched in their ears, dishes being washed, er.. some things followed by a toilet flush, hand washing, coughing, burping?  I’ll never know because somewhere along the way unmute became mute and mute became unmute
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(I actually wrote this 3 years ago and just found that I never published it, so figured now is as good a time as any.)